You’re mentally ill if you think anyone’s going to listen to that.Maybe colouring in, is the secret of not getting your CD’s thrown in the bin when you send them to places…
We will see.
Fuck you, Microsoft, and your 33% failure rate!
This week on ‘Tarrant Lets The Kids Loose’, Chris puts a group of sickeningly cute children in charge of the Large Hadron Collider, with catastrophic and hilarious results! Hear him weep and shout drunken abuse at his ex-wife as he takes us all with him into the vortex.
Bearded Tits (Indieus Tosspotius): Spawning in provincial hellholes, these hilariously self-aggrandizing little creatures can be found nesting in trendy Camden bars, where they drink hideously expensive imported lager and wear consciously dishevelled clothes that look like they came from the Sue Ryder shop but actually cost more than a Nigerian family makes in a year. In the winter, they dwell amongst the pubis of whichever third-rate growler they have chosen to deify - Liam Gallagher, Ian Brown - surviving on lice, dead skin and kettle chip crumbs.
Q: How excited are you about the forthcoming JLS album?
A: Less excited than I am about the impending apocalypse that will wipe Cheryl Cole, Michael Buble, Robbie Williams, Black Eyed Peas, Alexandra Burke, Those Dancing Twats and every other dead-eyed shill off the face of the planet. Fingers crossed.
Tony Benn tears Neo-Con sock puppet John Bolton a new one on Question Time. If only he’d got his hands on Griffin.
